The Next Tour Will Be At 1050

Hi everybody, I’m your guide and my name’s Pete
As you go on board mind your head, watch your feet
She’s really quite old, and has earnt her pension
Been here since ‘81 without much care
But you see the  scaffold’s there
And she’s getting well deserved attention

This end’s for escape, its the fore-ends and TSC
These white lockers hold escape gear and here’s the SSE.
Originally there’d be 12. Then that was 9 in ‘60
Down the loading hatch via the rails
Onto the racks or through the rear doors
Cuddling up to the spuds to the carrots and more

Over the sill, to the bunks that stay warm
In the mess for sleep, to eat, to play that’s the norm
Some quite low bunks and some more roomy
The next space has a battery
(In ‘71 we lost Chief Kimber)
The tower to the 4 inch gun is in the Wardroom

Ah - here’s the control room, oh so busy, so much to see
There’s the fruit machine, its face all black and dialled
We’ve got four wells although not four masts
Warner’s gone but there’s attack
Two-eyed search is further back
And rotating radar brings up the rear

The left hand side, is the side with tappers
One to steer, and heed voices from above
The man behind can be shallow or quite deep
His neighbour is the level headed one
All that brass lifts us up or drags us down
Two elements do the work although we might Q

Eyes left - radar, eyes right - comms and here’s the heads
Oh! the galley! Small enough for babies heads
The heads are quite modern these loos  flush
On Talent and others before  
If those steps weren’t followed
Getting your own back was your just reward


And through to the engine room we go
There’s the compressor in the corner
And here’s a lathe and a 6 valve chest
On the surface or just under
(Using snort and exhaust)
These 2 Vickers donks will drive us on

On we go, nearly done, past the screamers
To the switch gear and all that copper
Motors under here for when we’re sneaky
Through one more bulkhead
To the after ends we go
And this is like the fore-ends only less so

And that, everybody ends the tour
Thank you and if you’d like to ask some more
I’ll see you outside and what’s more
Buy me a cuppa and a cake
And I’ll ever be your mate

Especially if I get at least four stars and a good review on Trip Advisor.
(OK - it hasn't got a good cadence and the rhyming is rubbish but I'll chip away at it)